Rejection?

Sorry but I dont really have any deep thoughts right now. Well, I guess I do, but I'm not so good at sharing them...or wanting to share them...or feel like anyone wants to hear them. I'm a surface level kinda gal and I'm much more comfortable talking about the weather than what's really going on inside my noggin (assuming that I could even get it into words). It's snowing, by the way...we got a few inches last night. I dont take rejection too well, so I dont take risks too often. And for me...going deeper than surface level is quite a risk. I feel way too vulnerable and awkward. I feel like others might think I'm an idiot or laugh at me or decide they'd rather screen my calls. Good grief! I'm thirty-something, not twelve.

But how many of us feel that way about some part(s) of ourselves? Physically. Mentally. Emotionally. Spiritually. And how do we disguise it? Wear clothes that we hope will hide it? Act like we're smarter than we feel we really are? Avoid topics/people? Stay superficial? Crack a lot of jokes? Yeah...we all do it. We've become experts at hiding our insecurities. Why? Because it's too painful not to. If we confront it and admit it then we think that's who we are and it's all we see. If it's all we see then we think it's all everyone else sees too. Rejection. We hate that!

I'm sure I heard this train of thought from Beth Moore: it's easier to please God than people. How true! It's easier to please God than anyone else...even ourselves. We never feel good enough, smart enough, slim enough or that we do enough or do it well enough. Who are we trying to please? We humans can be so judgmental and condemning. Of others. Of ourselves. And if we can get the focus off of us and onto someone else we're relieved. So the games begin.

People see only what we want them to see...most of the time (heaven forbid we get "outed" for something excruciatingly humiliating...or get slanderized by untrue/half-true gossip!). We try to control what others know about us. And we care what people think of us. (Yes, even those who "dont care what others think." It's in there somewhere. It might be more true to say they "dont care what most others think" or even they "mostly dont care what others think.") We care. We want to be accepted. And we get slapped in the face over and over with some kind of rejection from people/ourselves. (If we didnt, we wouldnt feel like we're never "enough.") But people dont see everything.

God sees everything. Every. Thing. He knows what we're thinking and he knows what we're really like...deep down inside where we try to hide it. Does he ever reject us for it? Never. Not ever. We're enough. Even if we're not smart, slim, witty, in-control, or got it all together (who does?). We're enough. We're accepted. Always. He loves us. Always. Just like we are. All he wants is our love back. To believe him. (I feel the need to add that it's because we love him back that we want to obey him and serve him and please him.)

We have to ask ourselves...who are we trying to please? Who's opinion actually matters? Why do we spend so much effort pleasing people/ourselves...who may never be pleased? Exactly how much effort am I spending on that, anyway? How much effort am I spending on pleasing God?

It's just so easy for me to get sidetracked and distracted from what's really important.

So...those are my thoughts for today. I have to remind myself of this periodically and you got to hear it this time. Lucky you!

My Favorite Things

I've been drawing a blank on any new posts lately...and have been kinda too busy to even think about anything. But thanks to Jenni I am actually going to post something today...Lord willing. Jenni posts her favorite things each January so here are some of my favorite things...in no particular order:

1. Electric blankets...dual control!!! Oh yes!
2. Three-fourths of my kids can wipe their own hineys.
3. Standing in front of the wood burning stove on a cold day.
4. Getting a new book.
5. Coffee...with sugar and flavored Coffee Mate (especially Peppermint Mocha).
6. Getting email...from people I know, not junk emails.
7. Reading other people's blogs.
8. Chocolate (remember, I said in no particular order...otherwise this might be first).
9. Watching Stan play with the kids.
10. Getting up before the kids do and having some coffee and quiet time with God.
11. Mexican food.
12. Snow.
13. Girl talk.
14. Hugs and snuggles from my kids...and the sweet things they say.
15. Lounging on the couch with Stan.
16. Being able to set the timer on the TV so it will turn off on its own after Stan falls asleep.
17. Calling mom when I'm driving somewhere.
18. The girls can do a lot of things on their own and help/play with Jake.
19. The girls all do their own laundry!
20. Pizza night.

Ok so that's all for now. I just realized many of these are winter-influenced. Maybe I'll have to do one in the summertime too. Feel free to post some of your favorite things in the comments section. Well...at least feel free to leave a comment!

Happy New Year!!!

Well happy New Year everyone! I have to brag that the first morning of my new year started off with the girls getting up, beating me to the kitchen and making me breakfast in bed! Awwwwww!!! Had I known, I would have jumped back in bed before they got to my room...but as it was I opened the door right when they got there. So I took it to the kitchen to eat with them. It was very sweet and they were so excited and said such sweet things to me. I know this is no where near in comparison to Mary...but I "treasured it in my heart" just the same.

Oh, and it was a bowl of cereal and a cup of water, in case you were wondering. In matching plastic bowl and cup. Purple.

(And before you get to thinking that it's always like this at my house. Let me assure you, it's not. In fact the past couple of days I've been on their case and on the verge of pulling out my hair. Just when I'm about ready to run through a wall, they go and do something sweet. But I'm also the first to say...they ARE sweet kids and we're VERY blessed!)

Anyway, as sweet as that was...and oh it was!...our new year is bittersweet. That was the sweet. On the otherhand, we got news on Saturday that Stan's Grandmommie passed away. He flew out to Kentucky for the funeral.

I'd like to say that the kids and I have a fun-filled day planned for today, but it's the last day of their holiday break and of course the teachers sent homework. Ugh. We dont need busywork...and I dont think they will forget all that much over the course of a week. But anyway...of course we put it off til now. Well...most of it. So that's what we're doing today. That and laundry. Fun, fun! Dont you wish you were here?! Aw, I'm sure we'll take a break to play here and there. We dont want to be dull...all work and no play.

Ok...gotta go rescue Elmo out of the Christmas tree. Dont ask how he got there. I'm not sure I want to know either. Is it wishful thinking that if I put an opened can of tuna on the floor that he'd come down on his own?

Christmas Tour of Homes

BooMama's Christmas Tour of Homes is here! Be sure to go check out the rest of the fabulous tour on her site!

I'll skip a boring intro and get right to the pics...that's what we really like anyway!

When you walk into our living room here is what you'll see:

This is our very tall (real) Christmas tree that Stan and the kids go and get each year. My best measurement of the height of our ceiling is about 13 feet...but I'm not too concerned about accuracy as I'm standing near the top of a 10 foot ladder, being scared of heights and all (which also makes decorating the tree at the top of a 10 foot ladder quite an experience as well)!

Here's a closer look (Ignore the crookedness):

You also have to appreciate that I took the time to unbox all the presents to put around the bottom of the tree for the picture. Because this is how the bottom of our tree really looks:

Yep. And all the gifts are inside the ugly brown boxes because 1) last year the cute 4 year old pulled down the 12 foot tree on top of herself 3-4 times (she was ok), breaking a few ornaments and presents, and 2) there's a 16 month old in the house who I feel would just be too tempted to unwrap everything prematurely, and 3) our dog (yes we still have the dog) comes in the house and drinks the tree water (choose your battles, choose your battles) and would love to help Jake unwrap the presents. It's self-preservation, really. I know my limits and I know with the above combination that by Christmas Eve my hair would be standing on end and fire would be coming out of my mouth.

Moving right along...

As you enter the living room and look around, here is what else you will see:

(Notice the dog and cat bobble heads inside the cabinet. Mackenzie picked those out especially for her mom and dad a couple years ago.)

You cant really tell, but the red lights on the mantle are chili pepper lights...love them! I keep some (plain) greenery and white lights on the mantle year round and get made fun of that it's Christmas leftovers, but it's not...I just like it. Also, I'm proud to say I made the wreath. Oh yes, I did. Aren't I special? No, I'm just too cheap to buy a premade one for three times the cost. It's one of my favorite additions for this year.

This is above the armoire (yeah, I had to do a spell check on that one) that the TV is in. Here's the bigger picture:

You cant really see the bell tree I got from Target that's on the hearth. It's another favorite addition for this year! Here it is closer up (it's a lot cuter in person):

Ok, moving along to the kitchen. When Jessica was a baby (she was born around Thanksgiving) I made the executive decision to NOT put up the big tree (Rebecca was a year and a half old and Mackenzie was 4) so I got a little 3 foot artificial one to put up instead. Now I use that one to put in the kitchen with some chili pepper lights and cowboy decorations (that MIL gave me one year) and some tatting ornaments that mom made. I love this little tree!!!

Above the dining table I have this quilt that mom made. During the year I have a different quilt hanging here that mom also made! Love it!





Finally...yes, I'm almost done! This is my very favorite addition for this year...a Willow Tree nativity tapestry bellpull that I have hanging in the entry way. (I got it from CBD by the way.) It's just beautiful! Oh and I would have shown a picture of our nativity set, but it's the Fisher Price one and I have a feeling that most of the pieces are in the bottom of a toy box. I'll have to get the girls to dig them out so we can display them.

So there you have it. That's the end of the tour. Feel free to hang around, have some coffee or hot chocolate and visit a while. I dont get a lot of adult conversation, so I'd love for you to stay!

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

(Yeah, I got that song stuck in my head. And you're welcome for getting it stuck in your head now too!!!)

I've said it before and I'll say it again...I LOVE Christmas!!! And I've been in a happy mood lately because of it and have enjoyed decorating and preparing and shopping and stuff. But last night I got sad. Stan was out of town working and after I put the kids to bed I decorated my chili pepper tree (you'll see it on Monday), finished wrapping their gifts, and got ready to mail the gifts to the grandparents.

That last one is what hit me. Usually at Christmas we go to grandparents house and visit and play and laugh and eat and eat and eat. We havent done that for a few years since we're a million miles away (ok...so it's only 1456 miles, but still...who's counting?). But as I wrapped/packaged them up I thought about what all we'd miss. The kids wont get to play/fight/play/whine/play with their cousins or get all their sweetness kissed and hugged right off of them by the female grandparent figures. We wouldnt get to smell mom making her famous cinnamon candy (but I'm considering buying that red Christmas candle at Bath & Body because it smells exactly like that!). We wont start playing some board games with Stan's family...and then remember why we dont play board games. We wont be rubbing the designated pregnant lady's belly (there's always a pregnant one in the group...usually it's me, but not this time!), trying to feel the baby kick and talking about all things baby. Stan wont go off with the guys to do...um...whatever it is they do outside. And I wont stand in the kitchen and talk girl talk with the women.

There's lots more but I wont drone on about them. You get the idea. Things we usually take for granted...or even complain about. That's what I'll miss. So I really dont mean to put a damper on your Christmas spirits. I just want to say...enjoy the season (especially the Reason), enjoy your imperfect families, have a fun time and dont put so much stress/pressure on yourself or anybody else.

Because even though we will miss all of those things...I'm excitedly looking forward to our quiet time here at home with our 4 little munchkins. I love watching Jake gaze in wonder at the tree and trying to touch an ornament without making it look like he's trying to touch it. (He touches it with the back of his hand...as if he wont get a "no-no" since he didnt actually touch it with his fingers! And when he gets the verbal "Jake! No-no!" he snaps around to look at me as if to say "why are you always there when I do this?"). [You also have to know that I sometimes act like I didnt see him because it's just too darn cute and I'm laughing too much to scold him...how's that for consistency?]

The girls will help me make sugar cookies...and I'll try not to be too anal about all the "help" and will pour all my effort into remembering it's for their fun and it doesnt have to be perfect. And we will all scold Stan for coming by and swiping some dough to eat. We will play board/card games and secretly realize that Stan sometimes loses on purpose so we dont get mad and quit. We'll play our Wii and laugh at each other flailing around like monkeys. Oh yes, wii will! And I cant wait to watch the kids open their gifts and shriek. And Stan and I will get up early on Christmas morning, turn on the tree lights and have some coffee before the kids wake up and make a mad dash for the living room. And I'll probably stay in my pj's most of the day. If it snows I'm sure we'll go sledding, make snow ice cream, snow men, snow angels...whatever. But we have yet to have a white Christmas since we've been up here. This is Montana...isnt it supposed to be buried under 6 feet of snow all winter long?! Yeah right. If it were, there wouldnt be so many transplanted Californians!!

I digress. So this post is my tribute to our families. We will miss you and wish we were there. Julie, Jay, Dana, Mom, and Terry...eat extra dessert for me. Haley, rub your belly for me. Mike, Mark, Monte, Dad and Charlie...you just keep doing your guy thing...and try not to wreck any motorcycles. You can eat extra dessert for me too!

Making Up For Lost Time

I promised pictures...so here ya go!







Jake was less than impressed with the whole "bundle up to go outside" bit. (But he liked it once he got outside and saw what all the fuss was about...they had lots of fun in the snow. And yes, those are purple boots that were once Jessica's. Dont worry, since the taking of this picture we've been able to transform them into solid black boots...with the help of a couple Sharpie markers! We're SO upscale citizens here! Hey, at least it wasnt duct tape.)




Out behind the house is a nice sledding hill. The girls would come home from school, drop their backpacks and go sledding. Sad to say that all that snow is just about gone...we've warmed up to the upper 30s and it's been raining for two days. Ick! It's a sloppy, muddy, gooey mess now.




We woke up to this outside the kitchen window one morning. We barely got a picture before the moon disappeared behind the mountains.



Here's our Thanksgiving meal. It's amazing we got a picture...it was one of those hurry-up-before-Jake-pulls-everything-off-the-table pictures. The girls made all the placemats for everyone.

Jessica's birthday!!! Here's her purple cat cake. Thankfully it didnt turn our teeth colors like the last cake we had.


She had lots of help opening her presents!

And here's just some fun shots of the kids. I'll get more pictures added to the Nov/Dec 2007 slideshow link in the sidebar soon.

Holiday Happenings

I'm having a hard time deciding whether to use my childhood Christmas memories or current ones with my kids. Ummm...Ill go with current Holiday Happenings. And since I'm a slacker and was hoping to get this posted this morning and now I'm racing the clock until it's no longer the December 3rd deadline...bear with me!


I LOVE LOVE LOVE Christmas! Every single thing about it (of course, most especially the birth of our Savior).

Ok...some of the fun stuff we do with our kids is Stan takes the kids every year to go get our (real) Christmas tree. It's always a "secret" from mommy and the girls love bundling up, getting in the old beater pickup, picking out just the right tree, and surprising mommy with it. (I'm sure sometime they will start to wonder why when they get back the livingroom is somehow already rearranged to make room for the tree.) Anyway, I know the kids will have great memories of going out with dad to get the tree.

I love the idea of the kids having their own tree to decorate (from other posters of the Holiday Happenings)! I may have to start doing that! (I do have a little cowboy tree in the kitchen with red chili pepper lights and cowboy decorations.) But what we usually do is I give the kids each some ornaments for them to put on the tree...so they dont fight over them. And I hang the breakables up high with the ladder. Yes, we need a ladder...did I mention they get the biggest tree possible? Our ceiling is about 13 feet tall and we use every inch of it. I love it!!!!! But every year I get each kid an ornament and one for the family and I write the kid's initials and the year on their ornament. Then when they leave home I'll give them all their own ornaments to start their own tree with (and the reason I get one for the family is so when they all leave we will still be able to decorate a tree...and each one will remind us of each Christmas with the kids). I get all the same kind of ornament...like one year I got angels and they were all the same kind of angel but one was holding a tree, one a candle, etc. So they were all just a little different...but the same. Did that make one bit of sense?

One thing we started last year and I really liked was Stan and I each took two kids and gave them each a little money to shop for all the other kids. So each kid got to pick out gifts for their siblings. They loved picking out just the perfect gift for each one and they were so excited for them to be opened. And of course we always have tons of little "presents" under the tree that the kids have made for each other and us out of paper and stuff around the house. I didnt count them last year but I'm guessing there were at least 30 under there.

Well, there's SO much more I'd love to write about but I better stop here. Check out more Holiday Happenings at Conversations With My Hairdryer!

Flight of the Bumblebee

Have you ever done the "Flight of the Bumblebee"? First you have to know the song. I know you know it...it's one of the classics, and I dont mean Lynyrd Skynyrd. I mean real classics...but I dont know who composed it or wrote it or whatever. I'm not that cultured. (You can google it.)

Anyway, I do it quite often...when someone calls and says "I'm coming over" (or 10 minutes before Stan is supposed to be home) and I look around at all the mess and I run around frantically stashing all the clutter wherever it will fit, hoping that I can find the important stuff again later...that's the Flight of the Bumblebee.

So this post will be my Flight of the Bumblebee in blog world because I dont have time to do a full posting of each event right now so you'll just have to get the fast-forward version. Here we go (hum the tune to yourself as you read...that is, Flight of the Bumblebee, not Sweet Home Alabama)...

• (Oh look! Bullets! So easily entertained.) Thanksgiving was good. We didnt get to go anywhere because Stan was on call and by the end of the 4-day weekend I think he had 80+ calls. But we all stayed home, had a traditional Thanksgiving meal, filled our bellies, played Uno, Skip-Bo and Dominos, watched movies, Stan and the girls went out and got our Christmas tree, and we put it up and decorated it. I'll post pictures...sometime.
• Jessica had her 5th birthday this week! Cant believe my baby girl is 5!! *Tears* She asked for a purple cat cake. It didnt turn our teeth colors like the black dog cake did. She got a rescue pet and some littlest pet shop pets and some cold hard cash which she promptly shoved in her piggy bank. I'll post pictures...sometime.
• It's been a busy week of Christmas decorating, birthday celebrating and shoveling snow. Yes, we're still getting more on top of the foot we got earlier. If you're not already sick of them, I can post more pictures...sometime.
• We got a Wii. Oh yes. We did. Even thru the shortage of them...we got one. You have to know I am NOT a gamer. Not one bit. Never was. I mean Atari was fun...but how old was I back then? Dont answer that. I never did get very far in (the original) Super Mario Brothers, although I could do the duck hunt until they get really fast and I get nervous. And Mackenzie beats me all the time in Super Monkey Ball on the Game Cube. But for some reason I'm excited about the Wii. Maybe because it's not a normal game console and they say 4 year olds can do it. I get so tense trying to play that I sweat like crazy and need a nap afterwards. I'm nervous just thinking about it! I probably wont post pictures...sometime.
• I need to end this post soon because Mackenzie keeps coming in and tries to read over my shoulder (I cant stand that!) and the Wii is for their Christmas present...so I dont want her reading that part.
• Ok, I'm really going now. But I'm too mesmerized by the bullets.
• Cute.
• Little.
• Bullets.
• Bye.

Tummy Tempters

Edited: Ok so we've heard of re-gifting (I wont ask how many of us have actually done that...that's a whole 'nother topic!)...I'm re-posting. BooMama is doing a Soup-Tacular! Yum! Go check it out! But I had just posted this recently and I'm too lazy to actually create a whole 'nother post so I'm just re-wraping the old one and giving it away...again. Obviously the Soup-Tacular is just for, well, SOUP. But since my old re-gifted post had two recipes...the BooMama crowd gets a bonus breakfast recipe too! Enjoy!

I got nervous when I saw BooMama's Cheese Potato Soup recipe...but then I relaxed because mine is different from that one! Whew!! Thought I was actually going to have to go and find another recipe!

Ok....going Christmas shopping now. Be back...sometime...maybe!



It's recipe time! I got this first recipe from Terry when we went down south for a visit this summer. It's a fun change for breakfast and we have thoroughly enjoyed it.

Terry's Sausage Rolls

1 lb. hot sausage
1 8-oz cream cheese
2 Pillsbury crescent rolls
1 egg white, slightly beaten
poppy seeds (optional)

Brown sausage and drain. Add cream cheese and stir until melted. Flatten crescent rolls into 4 rectangles, pressing perforations together. Spread sausage mixture down center of dough. Roll up and seal. Place seam-side down on baking sheet. Brush with egg white and sprinkle poppy seeds on top.

Bake at 350 degrees for 15-20 minutes until browned. Slice and serve or freeze.

To serve after freezing, thaw slightly enough to slice. Place slices on cookie sheet (standing) and bake at 350 for 15-20 minutes until hot.

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I got this next recipe from Mom. Gotta love recipes from the momma! Stan made this for me when I was sick and it was sooooooo yummy! (and I'm NOT a cabbage fan)

Cheese Potato Soup

8 c. water
4 cubes chicken bouillon
2 lbs. red potatoes, cubed
1 1/2 c. onion, diced
1 1/2 c. carrots, diced
1 1/2 c. celery, diced
1/2 small cabbage, diced
1 lb. Lite Velveta cheese, cubed
optional - 1 jalapeno pepper, seeded and diced

In large pot simmer all except cheese for 30 minutes or til potatoes are tender. Add cheese.

Let It Snow!

It's here! Our first big snow of the season! Last night we got about 8 1/2 inches of snow and today we are expected to get another 3-6 inches. It's not very cold...just above freezing, so I dont know how long it will stay around this time. It's already starting to melt and it's only 8AM. But it sure is nice to get some moisture. I vision sledding, snow men, snow angels, and snow ice cream will be in store for the day! Pretty soon I need to go out and knock as much snow off of the tree so that the branches dont break. (No, I didnt wait for it to get light enough for pictures.) Stan and a friend from church are out elk hunting this morning...hope they get one!

Oh...and yes...school is running on time as usual. Are you kidding? If school closed everytime it snowed here we'd have to go to school all summer to make up for snow days! This is our 4th year up here and the school has never closed for the day. Never. There has only been one delay. Our first year up here there was one day where we started school at 10:00AM because it was below -20 degrees...yep...negative twenty...and the building needed time to be able to get warm enough. And if you're wondering about recess...kids just put on their snow clothes and go on out. The school rule is that if it gets below 10 degrees the kids stay in the gym for recess.

Last night church was at our house and we'd already started getting some snow...about 3 inches or so. All the kids went out and made some snowmen (after the snowball fight of course). But like I said...it's not that cold so they started melting and drooping. This poor guys looks down on his luck. We'll have to go cheer him up...after a bowl of hot oatmeal!

Better get going. We've lost power some during the night and the lights are starting to flicker again. Dont worry...we'll be all roasty and toasty, with or without power!