The Note

The other day we actually had really nice weather. Shocking, I know. (It was snowing this morning.)




When it came time to make the Kindergarten run we did the usual -


everyone hurry up, we gotta go...

brush your teeth and hair...

get your shoes on...

those clothes don't match...

hurry up and change them...

don't argue with me...

they don't match and you're not going to school looking like that...

here, wear this...

I know you don't want to but we gotta hurry...

what do you mean you're not finished with lunch?...

why did you get up and play if you're not finished?...

take it with you...

hurry up we gotta go...

wash your face...

where are your shoes?...

look in your closet...

why are they not in your closet?...

where did you take them off?...

look under the couch...

look in the sunroom...

oh, just wear your snow boots...

hurry up we gotta go...

get your jacket and backpack...

did you wash your face?


And somewhere in there I just grabbed Jake, the innocent by-stander, and stuck him in the car, as is. However, "as is" meant he wasn't wearing socks and shoes, which was fine because I didn't plan on him getting out until we got back home.




But, like I said, it was a nice day. Oh, nice days, why are you so few and far between?




After we drop Rebecca off for Kindergarten, Jessica asked if we could go to the park. She was right...it'd be a nice day for it.




Alas! I didn't bring Jake's shoes! So we didn't go. We just went home, besides I had things I needed to do. Jessica was heartbroken and asked if I would bring Jake's shoes next time. I'm sure I mumbled something like "uh-huh, buckle up."




Then it went something like this:




Jessica: Mom, do you have a piece of paper?

Me: No.

Jessica: Do you have a pen?

Me: No. (liar...I probably did, just didn't want to dig for it and I wasn't about to let her operate an ink pen while sitting on the leather seats of the Excursion, lest we forget her destructive ways.)

Jessica: (silence. Wow! Really? Silence?)

Jessica: Here, Mom. Keep this. (handing me a piece of torn Wendy's napkin, thankfully it was unused)




Me: What's this for? (like my grammar?)


Jessica: It's a note for you to remember to bring Jake's shoes next time so we can go to the park.



Oh yes. I'm Supermom! I've always got it together. I never miss a beat. My kids are always perfectly tended to and ready to go at a moment's notice. I'm on the ball.

That's why my 5 year old knows to write me notes to help me remember stuff. Even though the only words she can write on her own are: JESSICA (with a backwards J), CAT, MOM, and DAD.

I wonder what she would have written if I'd actually given her a pen.

Picture Catch-up

Making a train and running around the living room:

Peek-a-boo!!!

Rebecca's front tooth is finally coming in:

Silly goose!

The little turkey climbed up there all by himself. Note the bare feet:

Cooooooooool

The girls helping the guys get ready to go fishing:

Oh Hannah Hannah Bo Bannah

Considering I live under a rock most days I hadn't heard about the Miley Cyrus photos that have come out. Being a mom of Hannah Montana fans, this is just so disheartening.

The article I read (on msn) says that Miley thought the photo shoot was supposed to be "artistic" and so participated in a shot of her clutching a silk sheet with her bare back exposed.

Oh Miley.

Where were your parents? Supposedly they were there, but supposedly they left before that shot. Who knows, supposedly?

But your daddy should know how this business works and should have been there to say, with his southern accent, "Honey, that's not art. They just want to exploit you. There are dirty old men (and young men) that just want to see you naked and that person telling you this is "art" just wants to make lots of money off of how naive you are. Let me tell you about the birds and the bees, darlin'."

*sigh*

Yes, I'm aware that there's probably more to the story than what we're told...and there's always many sides to every story. But I can still have an opinion on what little I know.

Bottom line...Daddy's Don't Let Your Babies Take Risque Photos (maybe that should be the title of a country song?)

And before I end this rant, I just want to know how ignorant/blind people are? I mean, does history not teach us anything? Have they not learned from previous teen stars and how their exploits and star-studded decisions have ruined them? Does any one care about said star or are they just looking at how they can make the biggest buck?

Ode to Blanket

Oh Blanket, how I love thee

You've been missing from my arms all the day long

I need to feel your softness on my face

The aroma of three-day old drool intoxicates me

You follow me where ever I drag you

How I miss thee

Oh wait. Hold on. I need to pick my toes.

Oh Blanket, how I love thee

You embrace me through the dark hours of the night

I call for you

I call for you

I call for you

Blaaaaaaanket...where aaaaaaaare you?

There you are, oh Blanket, oh Blanket

How I love thee

Dear Fiskars,

I need to file a complaint. Your children's safety blunt-tip scissors are defective. They cut with such ease and precision. They cut things like the elastic off of tennis shoes, fringe off of couch pillows, the tops off of socks and pajamas, holes in blankets, fur off of stuffed animals, and even human hair.


I understand that in this modern world of technology we strive to make things better and more efficient. But I'd like to know what happened to those crappy difficult-to-use, blunt tip, all metal scissors that were available when I was a child. They rarely cut paper and wouldn't even come close to cutting cloth or elastic. The only danger they posed was when they were thrown across the room because of built-up frustration from their lack of cutting ability and from the painful cramping in the thumb and finger area. If those scissors were still available today, it wouldn't be necessary for me to file this complaint.


However, if I were a modern mom I would not stop with a letter. Oh no. I would blame and sue you for making scissors that enabled my 5 year old to cut the items listed above. It would be all your fault and I would make the news and you would settle out of court just to make me go away. My child would turn into a spoiled brat and feel that she was entitled to do anything she pleased and her mother would back her up.


But as it is, I'm a practical mom who knows that scissors don't cut things, people do...namely my 5 year old. Her tear-streaked face and sore bottom are proof of where the fault really lies. (Not to mention, where was her mother when all this cutting was going on anyway?) And in 10 years when she is finally allowed access again to privileges such as television, toys...and scissors, she will fully understand that she is in control of her own actions and not look to blame anyone and everyone else for what she does.


So I kindly ask you to please consider going back to making the crappy difficult-to-use blunt-tip scissors. It would be for the sanity of mothers like me, and for your own protection for when this happens to a modern mom instead of a practical mom.


Sincerely,
Frazzled, Practical Mom




(Note the missing hair from her bangs and how one side of her hair is markedly shorter than the other side. I guess she was going for the "layered" look. Also note the trimmed corners of the couch pillow behind her. Oh and said stuffed animal did not belong to her, but to her older sister...of course. The tennis shoes, socks and pajamas were hers, though. She will NOT be getting new shoes until she out-grows these.)

7 Random Things

I've been tagged (wow! my very first tag!) by my friend Shiann and now I have to come up with 7 random things (about me, I think)...

Hmmmmmmm...


1) I need to brush Jake's teeth...it's been a few weeks days (bad mommy!)

2) I just got my very first flat iron...and I *love* it! (It's the Remmington Wet 2 Dry one, btw, and yes it does work wonderfully!)

3) My left thumb is double jointed and I can bend it behind the back of my hand.

4) I used to be a "night" person, but since having 4 kids somehow I'm now neither a night nor morning person. Go figure.

5) I have my very own wood splitter...and I know how to use it. Such the mountain woman. Yeah, right! I make Stan split the big logs with all the knots in them.

6) My office is always a mess. Always. Even after I clean it. It drives Stan crazy. (Sorry, honey)

7) I used to have a belly button ring. Crazy college roommate thing.


And since I mostly stalk visit blogs of people I don't really know, and one of the people I actually do know was the one who tagged me, I'll just tag Jenni. You're welcome!

Amber, when are you going to get a blog started already?!

Update and a Funny

I know you've been propped on the edge of your seat just waiting for another gardening update. So without further delay, here it is.

The seeds have sprouted.

The end.

Ok, so I cant just leave you hanging without a picture.

Lovely photography skillz, I know. All but 6 of the 70 pots have sprouted and some are even growing their "real" leaves (which I didn't know that the first two leaves they sprout are not "real" leaves).

And see those really tall ones? Those are the naughty hollyhocks that gave me so much misery earlier. They must have learned their lesson.

I'll probably have to thin out the lobelia (far right two rows) because the seeds were like grains of sand so I just dumped some in...now they're everywhere! I'm a gardening genius!

So that's it. The very precious few "nice" days that we've had around here didn't go toward gardening stuff. And I just cant bring myself to get out and do it while it's snowing (even though most of the time it doesn't stick).

---

Now for the funny...

Last weekend some wonderful friends of ours came to visit from...across the state, where we used to live. We miss them.

Of course the Wii got plenty of exercise. At one point four players were set up to play golf, and Jessica was one of them. She's really bad at it, bless her heart, but she was going to play anyway. As the game loads it tells each players' record best score. Stan let Jessica know that she was +40 (yes, that is 40 OVER par...her personal best) and he said something about her needing to bring up her score. Her reply?

Without hesitation, she said, "And I'm gonna dance while I'm doing it!"

So I guess if you're going to be bad at something, you might as well dance while you're doing it. At least you'll have fun. Unless you're bad at dancing.



Oh...and here's another funny from today...same kid...

The girls ask one of two questions every time we go somewhere...do we get to go in? or...can we stay in the car? Dont ask me why, but they do. Every time.

Anyway, I pull into the Target parking lot and they ask if they can stay in the car. I tell them of course they are going in. They whine that they don't want to go in and Jessica asks me...

"Are you scared to go in by yourself?"

Funny Kids

The other day we were making the "Kindergarten run" as I call it (taking Rebecca to half day K...she rides the bus home). From the back seat I hear Rebecca informing Jessica of the rules on the bus. This is what I hear:

"Jessica, you cant eat, stand up, or have drugs on the bus."

Jessica's face was priceless as she wondered what in the world drugs were that they were as bad as eating and standing up in a moving bus...and did she have any that she might accidentally take on the bus next year.

---

The girls were getting dressed one morning and the excruciatingly annoying and never ending quite common saga of the case of "I don't have any socks" episode was playing once again. They have TONS of socks...somewhere. I asked to see Rebecca's socks. One was bright pink. One was dark purple. This particular time it struck me funny (usually it sends fury through my blood) and I unvoluntarily giggled.


At that instant I saw relief in each of their faces as they were anticipating fire coming from my nose. But instead I giggled. So being girls, they giggled too.


Then Jessica shifts to one hip, cocks her head to one side and raises one shoulder and says with a sigh, "Kids will be kids."


Funny girl!

Why Life in the Estrogen Ocean? Part 2

I promise this post won't be as long as Part 1. (yeah, don't hold your breath!)


Last week I decided I wanted a new look for the blog. I've been pretty tired of the brown background for a while but hadn't bothered to change it. After a long Montana winter, I'm ready for spring. Ready for color. Ready for refreshment.


After changing the color and adding a picture of the ocean to match the theme I was all set! That was easy enough.


But...


I've noticed that many blogs have a sub-title where they are more descriptive of their blog's main theme. After mulling it over for a day I realized that the whole ocean thing was even more appropriate than I thought.



The ocean can be beautiful and calm on the surface and you can let the waves gently carry you. Life with kids can be beautiful and calm on the surface. It's unpredictable, so there are waves. Our day-to-day doesn't always go as planned and the unexpected will happen. But if you go with the flow and run with it, the adventure will carry you to fun and exciting places. If you fight it, you've only managed to wear yourself out. The waves are still there.

But underneath that calm surface is the undertow. I admit that I had to look it up to make sure I was spelling it correctly. When I did, this is what I read in the definition for undertow:

~ an underlying current, force, or tendency that is in opposition to what is apparent


Oh! So true! Kids have a tendency to be a force that is in opposition to what mom and dad are apparently trying to teach them. (or...they are just in opposition to a-parent, sorry I couldnt resist the play on words). Raising kids is not always easy and fun. Sometimes you get caught in that undertow and if you try to just go with the flow in those cases then you'll get dragged under and start to drown. (Oh how I've been there too many times to count.) Sometimes you've got to fight.


Oh no, you will NOT sass me! No, you cant watch cartoons all day long. Yes, you have to take a shower. Yes, you have to do your chores. No, you cant have a sleep-over at (that horribly bad influence) so-and-so's. Do NOT hit. Be nice to your sister. Be nice to your sister. Be nice to your sister.


Yeah, those are pretty "mild" but you have to fight those "mild" ones if you're going to have any credibility on the "major" ones later.

Why Life in the Estrogen Ocean? Part 1

Well I never really said much about why I picked this particular name for the blog. Most of the family and friends know, but for any lurkers that might not...this is for you.


Several years ago, BB (before blogs), I started a website so that I could post pictures for family and friends instead of having to email them to everyone. Or worse...actually get prints and sort and mail them out, which was actually more of the case back then because we didnt have a digital camera. We had a scanner, so I would scan the prints and load them onto this cool (free) website. I even had a separate page for each kid. Lots of fun. But VERY time consuming! It was worth it, though.


Fast forward to 2006 AB (after blogs), I'm thinking...what in the world is a blog and why in the world would anyone want one? Sounds boring. Gimme a break! (Dont worry...I said the same thing about cell phones just over a decade ago. So dont rely on me to find what's going to be hip, hot, and trendy.) But then my friend Jenni got one...and she admits freely that she's no computer genius, so how hard and boring could it be? And Beth Moore got one. I was starting to see how fun it was to read them, but still hadn't considered actually doing one myself. And who would want to hear what I have to say anyway?


I was getting very tired and annoyed with my old picture website, so I thought I'd give blogging a try. For lack of imagination the sake of continuity I kept the same name I had from my old website. Obviously when I had started the old website we didnt have 4 kids. We had 3 girls. Girls. Girls. And more girls. In a house with 4 females, Stan said he was living in the Estrogen Ocean. Hence the website name.


So even though baby #4 has blessed our family and, as little boys do, is already starting to balance out some of the estrogen in the house I'm keeping the name. For one, I cant think of anything else. And (b), I'd have to resend the new site to everyone all over again and confuse the snot out of everyone and hope that they saved it and didn't get lost in the shuffle. Besides...it's still quite the Estrogen Ocean here, especially now that big girl #1 is getting closer to puberty by the minute. (Whoa! That's scary just typing it!)


(You can go here for Part 2)

Hello, Professor

Oh the joys of big sisters' broken toys! (At least they weren't pink.) Normally he would yank anything off that we try to put on his head (sunglasses, hats, etc), but he really loved wearing these. I had to remove them myself so he could take a nap.




You cant tell it from that cute smile...but poor baby's got a cold.

Yep - he's a daddy's boy. Big time!